Detangling is a word used in the natural hair community meaning to comb out the kinks out of the hair. There is a way Type 4C hair gets matted that one needs to take it slow, care in combing it out. Equipments needed: wide-tooth comb,mirror, water, conditioner, distraction, patience and hands. This must be done in a careful manner ( that is if the individual really cares about their edges) This past week I undid my protective style of braids. And since in school we had a shortage of water…( third world countries problems) I had to wait until I had sufficient water to wash my hair. But the wait got too much and there was no light at the end of the tunnel that there was going to be running water any-time soon so I fetched water in a bucket and washed it. Mind you my hair had been in a PS for 4 weeks. Have you ever gotten complements for things you did not put effort into and makes you feel guilty? I did feel guilty!
My guilt got the best of me and I sat down and detangled the hair. While sitting there wincing at how painful it was, how much hair was falling off, I thought of so many things (my hate for cats, what caused the first world war, what if I just cut of this hair, how many people would be screaming at me, Who is Chrysostom? should I do my assignment? ……many things go through my mind at any given moment its scary) and one of them was principles.
Principles are those things that holds you as a person, differentiates you from the next individual….but that is my definition, the English dictionary says: a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of belief or behaviour or for a chain of reasoning.
what are your principles? what are your fundamental beliefs or behaviour?
In the daily life of this human being I call me, I was able to learn new truths about myself, or lets just say reconfirmation of certain truths. One is that I am frank, open, honest, and direct in speech or writing, especially when dealing with unpalatable matters. I have for a long time known that but this week i was able to deal with it, and see myself from another point of view.With synonyms such as: plain, straight, straightforward, explicit, unequivocal, candid, direct,etc I noted that was being more straight forward than candid.
To get to where I want to reach with this topic for today, what I want to say is that just as when detangling hair one needs a list of things, one to define who they are what they stand for, what are their principles we all need those things.
One, we need a mirror, a mirror in this case is an honest friend, to tell you like it is without pretence or fear.
Two, we need conditioner, the restoring, the hope that things can get better. Conditioner restores the hair, gives it shine, repairs damages,etc. That is belief in a better tomorrow.
Three, we need hands: we need to do the work ourselves, our parents will not, our friends will not, as much as your pastor is a loving person and very mentoring he/she will not do the work for you. It is a personal journey.
Four, we need a wide-tooth comb, one can not enclose themselves away from everything and everyone and expect to learn or develop anything new. In this case what I mean is exposure, experience, information, people….
Five, we all need patience. Rome was not built in a day.Look at the great men and women that we consider our heroes and role models ( Nelson Mandela, Wangari Maathai, Martin Luther King Jr., Billy Graham, Margaret Thatcher, Steve Jobs, Maya Angelou,etc) they are all share an element of age. Look at the age at which they were finally famed? Take your time in working on your foundation. Patience is a virtue.
Six, we all need water. Water is life. John 14: 6. Jesus is the way, the truth and life. Get connect to Jesus.
P.s : thank you for reading, and your comments and suggestion, which I appreciate very much are being worked on. Next post will cover relationships and my take.As one of you asked. Keep it right here for that and send in what you would like me to write about.